Excitement

The fog rolled in late last night! I love fog almost as much as I love a snow storm. I have been feeling an excitement similar to snow storm excitement so it's no surprise that I woke up with joy bubbles roiling in my middle since two thirty AM. The fog is still here. I'm seasoning my Dutch ovens with schmaltz, leftover chicken fat. I've got the white plastic summer box fan airing out the kitchen and my overnight sourdough whole wheat bread rose up over the top of the bowl. I braided it and it is rising now too. The washing machine is agitating our clothes and the coffee pot is going. And I am dancing!

The other night at supper time I accidentally burned my hand in hot water. It happens every year at this time because I forget how hot the water can get from the boiler. I was so angry about it I had a scream fest. I let it rip! A string of curses. Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttt. Sounds good when you belt it out. 25 years ago I used to scream a lot while driving in my little blue VW bug assuming nobody could hear me! I tend to scream a lot if I have more than a few cups of coffee! I used to love to go to the glass recycling dumpsters at Brown University and recycle my clear glass apple juice jugs by smashing them from a height, and screaming! There's nothing more satisfying than that when you've got a bit of rage in you. And we all occasionally do. Arthur Janov would be proud. He's the guy who wrote the Primal Scream a 1970's therapy of screaming. The Buddhists think this is ridiculous and we are just making more bad karma by yelling. Perhaps they have a good point. I'm not suggesting we all scream but I think if we had safe and humorous ways to express anger and frustration like punching pillows and chopping wood with an axe (while screaming - I guess I like to yell) we'd be less likely to shoot each other or strangle our children. As a teen I loved beating the air bubbles out of clay imagining the clay was the face of my math teacher. I'd be centering the clay on the potters wheel imagining it was my mothers face spinning around melded by my strong hands. What a wicked child, you say. Bruno Bettleheim wrote an amazing book called Uses Of Enchantment all about the importance of fairy tales and how the gore and violence in them is important for kids so that have a way to process their anger. All the people in childrens publishing who believe childhood is sweet and all children are adorable don't recall having been one! A great book to read is Boy, by Roald Dahl. Now there's a guy who made magic out of his rage and what an amazing storyteller he was. My brother wrote him a fan letter in third grade and he received an nasty letter back saying you think I have time to write to you creepy kids! Perhaps this is why my brother isn't a big fan of writing his heroes.

Anyway I am baking an election cake and we are going to scream with joy today!