Now before going to a party, I just tell myself to listen with
affection to anyone who talks to me, to be in their shoes when they
talk, to try to know them without my mind pressing against theirs, or
arguing, or changing the subject. No. My attitude is: 'Tell me more.'
This person is showing me his soul. It is a little dry and meager and
full of grinding talk just now, but presently he will begin to think,
not just automatically to talk. He will show his true self. Then he will
be wonderfully alive.' ...Creative listeners are those who want you to
be recklessly yourself, even at your very worst, even vituperative,
bad-tempered. They are laughing and just delighted with any
manifestation of yourself, bad or good. For true listeners know that if
you are bad-tempered it does not mean that you are always so. They don't
love you just when you are nice; they love all of you.
―
Brenda Ueland,
Strength to Your Sword Arm: Selected Writings
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