Back

My husband threw his back out on Saturday morning. After several agonizing spasms and a gentle slow lift to get him off the floor we called our doctor for an emergency visit. We quickly realized this would be impossible since couldn't get him into the car. When we called the doctor back she said "call 911." We were both hesitant to take that approach; firemen, ambulance, stretcher, hospital, oh my. "What about Urgent Care," I suggested. "They are only 4 blocks away." We phoned and they explained that they take Blue Cross and the office was not busy at the moment. Since walking slowly was doable we walked over. The NP saw us right away. She was fantastic and bubbly and after a consultation she sent us home with detailed written instructions. Minutes after we arrived home the CVS robot phoned to say everything was ready. I picked up ibuprophen 800's the muscle relaxer and a box of 4% lidocaine patches. We attached an ice pack on his hip using a woven belt (for 20 minute sessions). Then I went to Stop and Shop using Bill's car for the first time ever and bought the fattest chicken they had 8.7 pounds and I began roasting it. I roasted another pan of onions carrots and potatoes in olive oil at the same time.
Since the chicken would bake for about 3 hours I figured I'd start vacuuming the bedroom and living room and cellar. I needed to use my panic manic energy. The house smelled great.

"I have a problem," my husband said. "I have to poop. I can't sit so I can go from a height and make a splashy mess or I can stand in the shower." We opted for the shower. I laughed uncontrollably and said "It's just like a bear shit in the woods! I clean up the cat box and scoop up after our dog every day. We can do this." I grabbed rags and a plastic bag and blocked my nose. Done!

After an 18 hour day of Bill being unable to sit we slowly and carefully got him lowered into bed and he slept well. The roast chicken scent was so powerful, I kept rolling over thinking, "we're sleeping inside the chicken."
The next day Bill was 50% percent better and with help getting out of bed he was able to sit for the first time in 24 hours. We sat together at the table and ate scrambled eggs and toast for breakfast.

The baked chicken had cooled overnight in the fridge. After we had two sandwiches for lunch I skinned de-boned and chopped all of the meat. I made a chicken salad dressing from mayo, buttermilk, mustard, red-wine vinegar, Adobo, kosher salt, fresh black pepper, 3 white onions minced, 7 ribs of celery chopped. We filled the biggest bowl in the house. It came out great. Buttermilk is a great addition, it adds creaminess and marinates the mixture. We even added Cholula hot sauce on top. It was delicious with home made whole wheat bread toasted and thinly-sliced pickles.

The following day was even more improvement for Bill's back but he was still too fragile to drive to work. "You are as fragile as a case of champagne glasses, not your usual mason jar self," I reminded him.

Every muscle in my body was sore. So I went swimming. I was very chatty at the pool. I was hypomanic from the ordeal. The lifeguard knows me and anyway he used to work on a psych ward at the hospital, he understood and was sympathetic. The water helped center me and it stopped my muscle pain.

We enjoyed chicken salad again for dinner. I fell asleep at 7:30PM.

The next day back to work. Back to center. Back. AMEN.