A woman I knew when I was seventeen used to look me up when she was on the east coast. She did this over the years and I felt obliged to host her for dinner and meet her various husbands.
More recently her demands got a bit desperate. She said, This is the last time I'm going to be in RI. I thought that was unnecessary. Is she manipulating me? I am not a social butterfly and I rarely entertain. I'd say I'm an introvert.
The last time she was here she cancelled coming for supper at the last minute. I was disappointed but I knew she was visiting her ailing mother. Then the following year she came to see her mother in hospice and I expected she would cancel our dinner plan.
Her mother died while she was in town. I told her I was sorry for her loss. She cancelled the plan to come for dinner and I understood but I was also hurt. She kept emailing me during that week and I was incapable of even looking at the emails anymore. I think one said, Are you mad at me? Of course I was but I wasn't going to go there for Chrissakes her mother died.
I told myself, She cancelled, I expressed my condolences, we're done for now. I need to take care of myself.
A year went by. There were fires in her region of the country. I sent her an email letting her know I was thinking of her. I was hoping she was healthy especially with the fires and covid.
I received an email back from her saying, Don't ever contact me again, after the way you treated me when my mother died. It shocked me. I guess she's okay, I thought. Then I puzzled over it and I am still haunted over her response.
I think she wanted to slam the door on Rhode Island and now that included me. My husband thinks she was trying to maneuver me and I didn't fall for it.
She really was a stranger. I knew her briefly when I was 17. She never wrote back when I would write her during the year. For all I know she does this to all of the people in her life.
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