Introverts, over-giving is not kindness, it's a coping mechanism to avoid rejection. Here’s why it happens and how to heal yourself:
1. Over-giving starts early: You might have grown up in an environment where acceptance felt conditional. It was based on how much you contributed. So, you began to believe: - Only if I offer enough, will I be truly valued - If I stop giving, I'll be overlooked or abandoned Karun Pal @karunpal · 2h
2. Why did it happen? This mindset is deeply wired. As a child, your brain prioritized feeling secure. Acceptance became your way of dealing with conflict. And over time, this response became automatic. Giving wasn’t just something you did, it became who you are. Karun Pal @karunpal · 2h
3. As adults, it looks like: - Agreeing even when want to decline - Taking on more responsibilities than you can manage - Apologizing for your needs - Feeling guilt when taking time for yourself to rest - Second-guessing your decisions. - Feeling fear if you don't offer enough Karun Pal @karunpal · 2h
4. But here’s the reality Over-giving is a form of self-abandonment. - You overlook your own needs - You silence your authentic voice - You continue to give until you're empty - You offer more than you receive And you end up feeling unseen, unappreciated, and exhausted. Karun Pal @karunpal · 2h
5. Here’s how to begin your healing journey: Become aware of your patterns: The next time you over-give, pause and ask yourself: - Why am I doing this? - What am I truly afraid will happen if I choose to stop? This conscious awareness rewires your response. Karun Pal @karunpal · 2h
6. Establish boundaries Begin by practicing simple “no’s.” - No, I can't take on that extra task right now - No, I'm not available this weekend - No, I need some time for myself - No, I'll reach out to you later Remember: setting boundaries are essential for your mental health Karun Pal @karunpal · 2h
7. Practice receiving When you over-give, you find it difficult to accept help and support from others. The next time someone offers assistance, a kind word, or a gift, don't diminish it. Say, “Thank you,” and allow yourself to receive it, without any guilt. You deserve it. Karun Pal @karunpal · 2h
8 Reconnect with your true needs When was the last time you honestly asked yourself: “What do I need right now?” Your needs are valid. Spend time journaling, meditating, or simply sitting quietly with your feelings. Get in touch with your soul. Listen to what it's tells you.
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