Eating the Shadow

The shadow is made of traits we disown, "the part of us we fail to see or know." We've written in these pages many times about projection, the process by which we see in others those traits we disown in ourselves. Those aspects we respond to most vigorously in others are clues to what we don't see as existing in ourselves. Greed, arrogance, violence are things we see out there. The flaws, the not niceness, the badness of others.

Projection can also result from denial of our finer traits. Hero- worship and the glorious mystery of falling in love are largely due to projecting our disinherited inner divinity onto another.

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Eating the Shadow

How to integrate the shadow? Eat it regularly. Rituals, writing, artful conversation, taking time to be bummed out, allowing grief, imagining. Bly writes of eating the shadow:

"In daily life one might suggest making the sense of smell, taste, touch and hearing more acute, making holes in your habits, visiting primitive tribes, playing music, creating frightening figures in clay, playing the drum, being alone for a month, regarding yourself as a genial criminal. A woman might try at being a patriarch at odd times of the day, to see how she likes it, but it has to be playful..."

In a whimsical but instructive direction, Bly continues, "For the man, when he figures out which woman or women are holding his witch" (because he projected it onto her), he can go to that woman, greet her cordially and say, 'I want my witch back. Give it to me.' A curious smile will come over her face, and she may hand it back or she may not. If she does the man should excuse himself, turn to the left, and eat it."

To eat the shadow, retrieve the projection, there are countless examples of rituals, and we may (I'd encourage this) develop our own. Shadow rituals can run from the mundane (a famous Jungian and her housemate had the custom of requiring whoever had good fortune to carry out the week's garbage), to the formalized dramas of the Catholic Mass, or grand opera. Since the unconscious cannot distinguish between actual and symbolic acts, a ritual will pay out the shadow without harming anyone.

So much energy may be found, ready to use and at your service when you acknowledge your shadow. There is an accelerated system of teaching languages in which one chooses an identity opposed to one's actual life. The professor as a prizefighter, the lawyer as a nun, the salesman as a wizard. The energy released makes learning easier, and fun.

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