My stepfather had to wake up at 5 AM to read
in peace.
He had to tell my mother that watering the plants
was his time to relax
along with doing the crossword puzzle while smoking a pipe
in the black leather Eames chair
When I was 12 they were on the verge of divorce
and I hoped it would happen
so I could live with my step-dad.
Then our mother's gallbladder attacks started
and her pneumonia while in the hospital recovering
She told my older brother "Don't let me sleep or I could die"
and proceeded to
test him by faking sleeping
He caught the game.
Couples Therapy went nowhere.
Group therapy just brought them eccentric friends to entertain
Eventually they bought a country house to renovate.
They drove three hours each way every weekend
in separate Volvo's
to work on the house.
Their bed was so huge all five children could've joined in and we did
One year for a Christmas card photo in the driveway.
The same
driveway that the ambulance came to take my brother out on a stretcher
when my mother "lost" the anal thermometer up his butt.
He was eleven.
All the kids on the street were out asking what happened.
The same driveway where my mother gunned the brown ford station wagon
on the icy hill
over and over.
Woman against machine!
The same driveway snowy mornings we would shovel snow with our
father
so he could get to work.
The only chance we ever got to be with
him.
Our mother couldn't bear it shouting from the house
"You'll get nauseous without breakfast"
We
were not nauseous we were HAPPY to be with him.
Even then I knew
she was jealous when the attention lifted off of her.
She drugged us on car trips with doses of Dramamine
so she could
have conversations with my father
on the 3 day driving trip from NY to
what I called "Tampax" Florida.
Honeymoon was all she wanted, every night. All year long.
No kids.
Our housekeeper Jean made us dinner lentils rice chicken or pork
chops.
We walked home from school every day for lunch.
Jean made us grilled open face Muenster
cheese and ate with us. We never saw our father and mother except on
Sundays when our grandparents came or on holidays.
All other nights they
were having a honeymoon
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