Monday, August 12, 2013

The Apology

A colorful plastic toy keyboard had been sitting in our driveway for the past few weeks. My husband suggested that we should throw it away. Yesterday I spontaneously decided to find out who it belonged to. I walked over to where lots of young kids live at the third house on the big shared parking lot. "Is this yours?" I asked holding up the keyboard. A man said "Yes, the toy belongs to my kids." A woman was on the phone on her stoop. The woman said "Get away from me!" looking at me and then at the man while still holding the phone to her ear. "She is the lady who yelled at me." I went up to her and said "I am very sorry." I continued, "There was no good reason for that and it was very wrong." She said "My kids like you and your husband, Santa Claus. I see you but you look away." She demonstrated, turning her head and tilting it back. I wondered how that could be, since I never knew who I had yelled at. "Please accept my apology," I said. I took her hand and looked her in the eye. She continued, "I didn't do anything wrong, I was just looking for my kids, you would be worried too." "I know, it was wrong," I said. "Sometimes the noise in the neighborhood sets me off." "Yes, it's a very bad neighborhood, bad stuff is always going on," she replied. I objected; "No, there are a lot of good people, and it is the little relationships that make us feel that this is home." "True," she said. Like this moment, I thought. We can mend this, and turn it into something good.

"I didn't know who I had yelled at or if you lived here or across the street in the red buildings. I didn't even see your face. I was having a bad day. It is not my usual behavior and it was wrong. Please accept my apology." I clasped her hand again. "I was not in my right mind. I was even cutting the grass with scissors." I said, laughing. "Yes, I remember. I told my mother 'the lady who yelled at me was cutting the grass with scissors.' " Then we both laughed. "I accept your apology. We can laugh about it now." And she smiled.

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