Mark Twain

The difference between the right word and the almost right word is really a large matter — it's the difference between a lightning bug and the lightning.
- Mark Twain

The man who is a pessimist before 48 knows too much; if he is an optimist after it, he knows too little.
- Mark Twain's notebook, c. 1902-190340

The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
- Mark Twain's notebook

There are several kinds of stories, but only one difficult kind—the humorous. I will talk mainly about that one. The humorous story is American, the comic story is English, the witty story is French. The humorous story depends for its effect upon the manner of the telling; the comic story and the witty story upon the matter."The humorous story is strictly a work of art—high and delicate art—and only an artist can tell it; but no art is necessary in telling the comic and the witty story; anybody can do it. The art of telling a humorous story—understand, I mean by word of mouth, not print—was created in America, and has remained at home."The humorous story is told gravely; the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it; but the teller of the comic story tells you beforehand that it is one of the funniest things he has ever heard, then tells it with eager delight, and is the first person to laugh when he gets through. And sometimes, if he has had good success, he is so glad and happy that he will repeat the 'nub' of it and glance around from face to face, collecting applause, and then repeat it again. It is a pathetic thing to see.
- Mark Twain, 1895 essay "How to Tell a Story"