The Mother Wound

Article 

 by Bethany Webster

It takes courage to do this kind of deep inter-generational healing work!
It's a privilege to be conscious enough to embrace this healing journey.

Many of our ancestors did not have the courage, psychological capacity or the will to step onto this path.  Honor your choice to be a pioneer to break the cycle.

You are NOT a selfish or ungrateful daughter.....

• for wanting to heal, grow and release unhealthy patterns with your mother.
• for wanting to have a voice and authentically share your limits, needs, and boundaries in that relationship.
• for wanting to change the dynamic with your mother into something in which you ALSO feel seen, respected and understood.
• for no longer wanting to do all the emotional labor in your relationship with your mother.
• for feeling deserving of respect in the relationship and making requests that honor yourself.
• for having things you are unwilling to do in the relationship.
• for letting your mother have her upsets, tantrums without rushing to save or rescue her from herself.
• for wanting to limit contact with your mother (either temporarily or permanently).
• for taking space to focus on yourself and your wellbeing.
• for taking the space to reflect on what your childhood experience was like so that you can heal old patterns and step into more of your power and potential.
• for not answering the phone or the email in the timing that your mother wants.
• for no longer being willing to be the role of therapist, counselor or emotional caretaker for your mom.
• for having different values, beliefs or worldview from your mother.
• if you decide you do not want to continue certain family traditions in your own family.

These choices are all part of your sovereignty as a woman, as a separate individual with your own voice, needs, limits, and desires.

This is all part of self-worth, self-love and self-respect.

This is part of healing the Mother Wound as well as healing from codependency and enmeshment with our mothers.

Even if no one in your family understands why you are changing, growing or evolving, it's OK. Ultimately we don't need them to understand.

 

Becoming the "inner mother" to your inner child gradually creates the inner safety you need to be free, authentic, real, and receive all the good things you deserve in life.