Teddi's Epic Dream

I was in Mexico with a family who had a pet gerbil that they got from the wild. The gerbil, which I was calling a capybara, had a collar. They used to let him out of the cage and it would forage around and then they would catch it and put it back into the cage. Somehow I was responsible for it on a trip to a park. It had been let out and disappeared into the the woods. Shit, I thought. What if I can't catch him again?

I decided to just walk around and in due time the capy appeared and though I managed to wrangle him into the cage, which upon close inspection was a rickety box made from balsa wood with a complicated door, he escaped again. Fuck that, I said and tried to solicit help from a woman who was trying to sell me a washing machine.

No hablo español, I said.

NO. English! Washing machine! she replied.

I walked on and discovered a lake and a wooded path that went high into the mountains. It was magical. There were many eco and spiritual tourists there. Lots of English speakers here I thought and after befriending a gay couple who knew all about the local flora, I was able to snare another capy. It was just a different one. They'll probably know the difference. I thought.

Just then my friend Will walked by on his way up the mountain pass. What are you doing here? I said and then we kissed hello. Just going up the mountain, he said. But in about 5 minutes he came back down with a live tiger draped over his shoulders and a huge number of wild cat pelts on the back of a truck PLUS another truck with several big wild cats in it. I could burn all these skins right now and release all the wild cats he said. I've done it before. Apparently this was some kind of eco warrior situation to protest illegal poaching. But watch out! Because when I release them it's dangerous. He offered a hand and pulled me up on the truck with him where we sat nestled feeling safe.

 

Eventually I spotted the original capybara. Which I knew was it because he had a collar on. Oh well, now they'll have two.

 

Teddi Scobi (published with permission of the author)