Monday, June 26, 2017

Mood-Cycle Brain

What if you become numb?
Sometimes I have so many feelings that I become numb and immobilized.
My escape from this predicament is free expression in music. No tunes, no chords. Just notes, and lines.


For me writing, and walking are paths through confusion. They are fundamentally linear, one word, one step after another. Sometimes my head is so noisy that I need to run or swim before I can write. I require the physical element to navigate my mood-cycle brain. Writing also helps me develop my consciousness.

Long notes on the horn are a bit like lap swimming. Making sounds and breathing seem to make a direct line to the brain. It's healing even if the mood remains sorrow. When I am blue it lasts for three months. I call it 'my other house'. I have to move in and get comfortable. Swimming is a godsend because it lifts me a 16th of an inch and that is a life saver. It also grounds me and disperses anxiety and stress which I often don't realize I am carrying until it's gone. That might be part of what lifts me a sixteenth of an inch, unloading my stress in the pool.

When I am flying it also lasts 3 months. I need to move in and get comfortable. I need to swim or run to focus and ground myself but this time it's from the other side of the spectrum. I need to make an effort to SLOW DOWN so I can keep up with myself and find clarity and focus.

It is lonely because it is a fascinating journey that I can only describe. But maybe that is true for everyone. Maybe this is what makes us want to communicate.

I pray that I can remain a physically healthy person to remain mentally healthy.

The creative mood-cycle brain types have a lot to teach each other.

Become an expert at understanding your mood cycle. It will help you and those around you as well as folks just starting their journey of understanding.