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Avoidant ppl are lonely & they make everyone around them lonely too. They live entirely in their heads bc their bodies have been marked as enemy territory. Every physical sensation that says “you can open up” gets overridden by an alarm that says “danger, retreat, protect.”
Sometimes you’re drawn to avoidants bc their unavailability matches your own unworthiness wound. You don’t believe you deserve more & pick ppl who confirm it, trying to ‘fix’ them instead of healing. Let them figure out why every relationship follows the same pattern.
Stop abandoning yourself in the name of not abandoning them. The strategies that saved you from loneliness by accepting breadcrumbs will eventually become what you need saving from.
Niko
Once I stopped chasing people who made me anxious and started asking why I was ok with crumbs, my whole dating life changed. The real glow up is when you finally choose people from self worth, not from old wounds.
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