Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Chin Up, Leg Up

I hated gym class in elementary school. When we all had to participate in tryouts for The Presidential Achievement Award I knew it would be another round of humiliation and stupidity. But everything changed when I discovered interesting side effects to my exertion. If I pulled myself up on the chin-up bar and then hung there for a while, it would cause a sensation superior to anything I had experienced before! I didn't know at the time, but it was an orgasm. The same thing happened doing leg-lifts, or climbing the rope. I decided this meant there was a God and that this was his gift to me for having a mean mother.

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